This is something that made me stop playing TTT completely. There's way too much admin intervention. I wish I could say that it should be at the discretion of the server owner and admins, but it's obviously a responsibility they can't handle.
Well, you were playing on the wrong servers. Back when I pubbed, I had no issue finding decent servers. When I owned a server, our number one policy was to avoid intervention, and we pulled it off very well for several months before I just didn't have the time necessary to keep it going. Personal business. Consider avoiding the 32-man servers, custom servers, and other servers that are obviously prone to that kind of thing. When you dislike a server, add it to your blacklist. Look up vanilla servers through the tags. When a good server is empty, fill it up (people not doing this kills good servers quickly)! Take the initiative. Believe me, if you put any effort into finding a decent community, you will find one.
the instant someone dies, they are already screaming RDM into their mic and spamming it into the chat box
These were the people we would ban. In all honesty, the best thing you can do to keep the peace on a TTT server is to ban based on attitude, not particular actions. Everyone makes mistakes, but it is usually obvious whether or not the action was intentional. Banning the trolls and whiners keeps things much less tense.